Sunday, March 8, 2009

The Histrionic Beauty

“Beauty”!!!! I have tried to define it...I have tried to see it...I have even tried to be a part of it...and yet...I have always been proved wrong...I thought I had had enough of what they call love...and every time it came to me, it was by what I always believed was beauty...of the heart...of the face...or of the desires. I believed I was free and happy, that nothing could ever get me attached to anything so much that I will forget what I loved most...me.
Life has a funny way of circling in on you...just when I thought my life was perfect..and I needed nothing else...that I found you...
We talked so less...and yet...you knew so much...I didn’t know you one bit...but god knows I wanted to...There was an instant connection...an instant compatibility...I thought so much before I knew you...and to come to think of it...what I think of now doesn’t even come close to that...I think I fell for you the day you loved me...I think I wanted to be there for you, the day you wanted to be there for me...I think...
Hope is a funny expression...and desire is even funnier...Life was so simple before...a “yes” or a “no” was enough as an answer...and what I find now are questions to those very answers...is a yes enough??? Or is it something else...How could you be so selfless...How could anyone be so sublime...How could you expect nothing in return for your love...How could you not want me to make you mine?? How could you give me all your love when you knew all I needed was nothing...How could you give me all that support even when you knew I wanted none...How could you know me so well...even when you knew all I wanted was to be me...it was just not so done...
Now is when I know you...now is when I care...now is when I love you...and now is when u know...I am and will always be...right there...I never thought of loving you...I never thought of what is wrong and what is fair...Love is what you gave to me...and beauty is now not just a word anymore...it is more than life...It is we being together..it is you...with me.
You are beautiful sweetheart...I know now what I didn’t know then...I see now what I couldn’t see then...you define beauty for me...and you personify love...
It is tough to describe you love...what with your fetish for finding complexities in the simplest of things...what with your ever increasing desire to see everyone happy around you...what with you not being bad to anyone even when you are more hurt than I can see...what with your much acclaimed love for clothes and shopping...till it is meant for you...what with you finding the greatest happiness in the smallest of things...what with you being so true...and what with you being so free...
They are the smallest things only known to me which make you mine...You are special sweetheart...the kind of people you want to cherish all your life...a treasure whose worth is only known to those you love...and realised by only them who love you even more...Life seems so beautiful with you around...and when I look back I don’t see a way we could turn back on...It is a one way street that we are on...It is a path we have chosen...a desire we have nurtured...a relationship we have acknowledged...and a love we have shared..
I see people around me giving up...I see them confess love and then realise otherwise not too long after...and I am so glad that we share a love which is never meant to die...
Don’t ever change sweetheart...don’t even try...you have your flaws...but then...it only makes you more human...and so much more adorable...You are a complete sweetheart...and your love for me just re-instates how much I love you...
Cheers to you and to me...cheers to us being neither anymore...cheers to us being we...